Sunday, February 26, 2006

things i learned this week

I learned something very important earlier this week. Looking back it is funny, so feel free to leave funny comments.

  1. When one has a sinus infection, it is critical to read the expiration date of the milk because you can't smell the milk.
  2. It is also critical to check the consistency of said milk, to ensure it is indeed all liquid and not partially solid.
  3. If the milk has begun to turn solid, and you do not notice it, it will make you sick.
  4. If you put said mail on apple cinnamon instant oatmeal, you won't taste it.
  5. Food poisoning is no fun, especially the self-inflicted kind.

This is what I learned this week. I have learned my lesson, and won't forget it anytime soon.

sunday catblogging

Hey, that's not another pillow on the chair...

Monday, February 20, 2006

morning ice

crystal drops glitter
morning light shines everywhere
ice coats everything


gold feathers flutter
pausing for a brief moment
then gone in a flash

a quiet morning

The cats are all sleeping, in thier favorite warm spot. The house is still, Olympic Ice Dancing playing quietly on the TV.

Outside, freezing rain is falling, coating everything in a glaze of crystal.

I'm blogging again after having taken another short hiatus because of bronchitis/sinus infection. Kinda hard to type when sleeping, which is what I've done most of this week. The NyQuil Coma is truly a powerful force.

The ancient games play
All is quiet in the house
Outside ice coats all.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

snow in alabama


My little cat statue, all covered in snow.

Proof of snow.

Those are actual snowflakes. Or lots of spirit orbs. Either way, we're all gonna die!

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Book of Corporate Life

Not too far from the truth

1. In the beginning was the Plan.

2. And then came the Assumptions.

3. And the Assumptions were without form.

4. And the Plan was without Substance.

5. And darkness was upon the face of the Workers.

6. And the Workers spoke among themselves saying, "It is a crock of shit and it stinks."

7. And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said, "It is a crock of dung and we cannot live with the smell."

8. And the Supervisors went unto their Managers saying, "It is a container of organic waste, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

9. And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."

10. And the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another, "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."

11. And the directors went to the Vice Presidents, saying unto them, "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

12. And the Vice Presidents went to the President, saying unto him, "It has very powerful effects."

13. And the President looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good.

14. And the Plan became Policy.

And that is how shit happens.

some things everyone needs to know...

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes....(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)...(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour (Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. ("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

(30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm......)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people. (If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed. (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig??)

Monday, February 06, 2006

looks like i needed a one month hiatus

That was a little longer than I expected. First, no one is dead; Mom is doing just fine with her new pacemaker, she's back at work now and feeling good. I'm finally over the stomach and sinus crud which had me hating life, just in time for the snow today here in Huntsville.

I realized I also needed a mental health break. I came to the realization (a few months late and reluctantly) that the neuropathy I've been battling for almost a year now is permanent. No treatments for the actual problem, just medications to keep the symptoms from being too bothersome. Yeah, I had a nice, long private pity party.

I hope I'm over that now, and get back to my musings, rantings, and whatever the hell else I feel like posting here. Oh, and cats. What, you thing I forgot about the kitties? Nope, here's Callie Bellatrix viscously attacking my brother-in-law's shoes.

Die, evil shoe, die!